Friday, June 17, 2011

and then i bawled...

Sunny, clear, beautiful sky. Three swim-clad boys. Windows down. Good tunes flowing out of the speakers. Destination: Splash pad.

And then the lyrics:

What a life to take.
What a bond to break.
I'll be missing you.

I started crying. My 7 year old noticed. Was I surprised he did? That kid notices everything his mama does!

"What's wrong, Mom?'
"I just miss my mom."

           Silence.

"I wish I could have met her."

I thought I was crying before. It sucks that she doesn't know these precious babies of mine. It still amazes me that I can be flitting right along, and then the next, tears. Grief is hard. Grief is still there- 9 years later and probably forever.

And then?
"You will see your mom in heaven one day, right Mom?" "Yes, baby."

The radio plays-
On that morning
When that life is over,
I know...
I'll see your face.

What a SWEET day that will be!

ps  More and more each day, I learn how much God knew I needed this little {big} boy of mine!

4 comments:

Jasmine Hope said...

She was an awesome woman Nicole. I'm glad I knew her.

Anonymous said...

My thought is that she does know these precious babies of yours...perhaps she helped with the selection of them because she knew you would be their perfect mama. :)
~Dawn

Dawn said...

Lovely, Nicole!

♥Heather, Cash and Caleb♥ said...

I agree with Dawn. She does know your boys!! She knew them before you did :)