touched out is an understatement tonight.

you know that day where the two year old wakes up saying no from the second you pull him out of bed? and then continues to repeat the word all day, sometimes screaming it, while you try to get two children fed, bathed, dressed and out the door? and then he continues to scream it during preschool drop off?

and then i decided to be the fun mom who takes her kid to story time and that kid does not even participate but either a) sits in my lap or b) lays on the floor, wailing. kid! this is fun! it's ok to laugh!

and then you are invited to meet friends for coffee and you have an hour to kill before preschool pickup so you go and the two year old refuses to play at the really cool coffee shop play area for kids, but instead would prefer to climb up you, climb on top of a table, dump an entire baggie full of pretzels on the floor, and whine.

and then 5 minutes before you have to leave, the 2 year old becomes quite engrossed {suddenly!} in playing and now does not want to leave. and is telling you so with his screams. and by taking his shoes off for the upteenth time in the car.

so you get to preschool pickup and say, forget it, I am NOT putting that kids shoes on AGAIN. so you rush inside with a barefoot toddler because you are running late due to toddler antics, where your anxious 3 year old thinks you forgot him.

then you should also add in to this mix: not one, not two, but THREE little boys getting colds, one little boy coming home from his dads with his well-timed attitude and dealing with a moronic ex. Oh, please do not leave out that the husband is out of town and your kids have chosen that precise time to awake an hour earlier than normal each day AND not fall asleep until past 10pm.

so you put all your kids to bed early, wish you were into wine because you would totally have a bottle glass if you were and retire to bed early. with a bowl of honey greek yogurt.

and by you, of course I most definitely mean me. 

I would ask for a hug but if one more person touches me today, I might scream.

glimpses of my life

We had oatmeal for breakfast. I added brown sugar, cinnamon and nutmeg. It was amazing. 4/5 kids finished it completely. That is amazing too.

My 3 year old just walked into the living room, wearing his 7 year old brother's winter boots. Hysterical is not enough of a word to tell you how comical it is!

I spent my weekend going through boxes of papers that have accumulated over the death of a parent, 6 years and a good bit of procrastination. I am not even close to being done, but I will keep plugging along.

Also? We finally hung all our clothes up in our fixed closet! Makes it much easier to navigate in our room!

School starts for me (and Mason!) one week from today! I may take back that exclamation mark shortly.

I have decided it's off to the mall for us! Does your mall have a play area? Ours does, and it saves my life on super cold/hot days, and also when we just need to get OUT!!

hello moto.

in case you wondered where i had gone after my recent posting increase? did you wonder?

because i have an answer:

and it comes in the shape of a pill bottle. 

i started up on some different medication for my bipolar disorder, and per usual with medications it made me quite a tired girl.
{i am usually the side effect queen}

juuusstt as i was getting used to life again, we {my doctor and i} added another med to the mix. and it knocked me to the ground.
as in:
constant dizziness
nausea
sleeping 12 hours a night and still feeling exhausted
having a hard time keeping my eyes open during the day

it will regulate. but until then, i have no energy. no motivation. I pull myself around my house, doing the chores I must do, and resting the rest of the time.

it sucks, yes it does. but it's better than where i was.
it was important to me to get this new med in my system with weaning side effects before school starts back up! {10 days!}
and so i am.

face palm.

I am a prepared mama whenst {it's kind of like whilst. i like it. accept it.} out with my children. Very prepared. There is usually an extra outfit for the 2 & 3 year olds, toys to keep them all entertained, snacks a plenty for my crew, and then some for any other child as well, diapers, wipes, drinks, wallet, sunglasses, hats, and on and ooooonnnn...

I am a very prepared mama. I have found that being prepared means we spend less money while out, we are able to adventure for longer amounts of time, and the amount of time we are out is more quality time because we all stay happy.

Well then I decided to take my 5 children to the lake and meet my best friend and her son. 

So this required all of the above items, PLUS a loaf of bread, a jar of peanut butter, a jar of jelly, a knife, a tub of blueberries {washed} and 6 huge Nalgenes filled with ice water. I also threw in sunscreen, mosquito spray, 7 beach towels, a comforter to sit on, dry bottoms for the 6 & 7 year old, a blow up water floatie, swim diapers, and probably 75 other items I am leaving out.

I was prepared.


Until I arrived at the lake and found 5 children all running in forty directions and only one me to keep my two eyes on all five bodies. In addition to those tasks were making sandwiches, blowing up the floatie, and eating my own sandwich. I soon learned that 5 out of 5 of my kids had attitude, talking back, and basic disobedience packed in their bag, unbeknownst to me.

I then realized: I was so very unprepared.


It took me 3 hours to get us all ready and out the door. We stayed a little over an hour.

Sigh. Stomp, stomp, pout, pout, whine, whine. Biiiggg heeeaavvyyy siiigghhh....

Enter with Caution!

My blog posts are sporadic and not very upbeat or interesting lately.

I find myself very convicted these days as it pertains to my blog. I have been afraid of what it might mean to say what I really want to say- so I have been giving halfhearted posts.

That is over.
I will say what's in my heart and on my mind.
Life is not always perfect...people will not always agree...
And that's the way it goes.

I choose to be respectful with my thoughts. I only ask that you choose to be as well.

Stay tuned...