It's true.

You know this holiday?

The one where we celebrate this wondrous event?














Yup. So not ready for it!



















I certainly don't have one of these even in the house yet, let alone decorated.
















I certainly have not bought a single one of these either.



Yes, I know Christmas is 9 days away. I am also very aware that my aunt will be here a week from today and I have an entire house to clean in addition to my Christmas tasks.

So before I begin my monumental job, I am going to follow in the footsteps of the woman below:
















Whew! I feel much better!
Now it's off to conquer the world my list.

First stop:

Do you know what it's like?

Do you know what it's like to be sixteen years old and be told by your mom that she is sick?

Do you know what it's like to watch your incredibly strong mother get weaker and weaker as the days, weeks and months pass by and you cannot do a thing to stop it?

Do you know what it's like to wake up with your mother in the middle of the night and hold her hair back as she pukes because the chemo is making her nauseous?

Do you know what it's like to have a Hospice social worker come into your home and want to discuss what it will be like after your mother is no longer here, while she sits there and participates in the discussion?

Do you know what it's like to watch your mom fight the hardest battle of her life, for YOU and then watch her lose that battle?

Do you know what it's like to watch your best friend take their last breath?

I do.

Lately, the memories of that incredibly hard and beautiful year keep floating around in my head and forcing me to confront them.

So I am.

One day at a time.

Time....it just keeps a'ticking...

Happy 4 Month Birthday to my Beautiful Baby Boy!

How is this possible? I can't slow it down so I am just embracing every moment, every stage and every beautiful week I have with you, my boy.


What are you up to at 4 months old, Theo?

You are THE happiest baby I have ever met. Unless you are hungry or tired, you don't cry. You smile, smile, smile all day. You have learned not just how to laugh, but giggle and deep belly laugh and it seriously melts my heart.

You are such a ticklish boy. When I change your diaper, you laugh the whole time, because the wipes cleaning you tickle you so much. When I pick you up, you giggle from the touch under your arms.

You are ALMOST sleeping through the night. You eat between 11pm and 12am when Momma goes to bed and then sleep until 5am. Once you get up at 5, you want to play for a couple hours. Even though I KNOW I shouldn't encourage the early wake up call, I can't resist your sweet smiles and happily oblige your request for snuggles, kisses, tickling and rocking.

Except for your longer stretch at night, you eat every 1 1/2-2 hours, sometimes more often. You are a BIG eater and it shows in your chubby little rolls. You are still exclusively breast fed however you have started watching us very closely when we eat and even reach out your hands to grab food. Even though all the books say wait until 6 months to start giving you more than breast milk, I just don't see it happening. You are ready NOW.


You love sleeping in your carseat, even when it's in the house. We usually set you in there instead of the swing or your bouncy chair because we know you will take a good nap in your carseat.

You are 21 pounds!!! Crazy big boy!! You wear size 6-9 months and aren't far from outgrowing it. I am a little worried you will catch up to your brother Will- maybe it's your way of saying, NO HAND-ME-DOWNS!

You adore your big brothers and sister. You especially like it when your big brother Mason sings to you-and you don't seem to mind when it's Pop Goes The Weasel over and over and over. :)

 You have rolled over from tummy to back several times 2 weeks ago but haven't done it since. I think the mass of chub that is you is hard to move.

You do NOT like tummy time- you usually last about 5- 10 minutes max but you LOVE sitting up. It doesn't last long- you usually fall over attempting to eat your toes.

You have many nicknames- some of which are: Punkin Pie, Chunky Monkey and Munchy.

You are the absolute light of my life(along with your brothers!)and when I look at you,I can't believe I ever wanted a girl! You are absolutely perfect!