the unknown

A few months back, I had a parent teacher conference with Will's preschool teacher. We went over each of the steps an (at the time) almost 4 year old should be meeting, and Will was lacking in many of them. He wasn't able to write his name yet, he didn't recognize letters, had trouble telling shapes, could not count past 2 or 3 and had no interest or care in any of it. Will's teacher did not feel Will was quite ready to move on to the next preschool class. When I heard her telling me all of the ways my child did not measure up, I started to cry. In my head, I was putting all of this together with the thoughts I have had of Will since he was a tiny babe. He screamed from the moment he was born until he was 3 1/2. He can't stand having his head touched and will smack away those that try. He screams and puts his hand over his ears when music is too loud (and by loud I mean NOT AT ALL.) It takes him an EXTREMELY long time to warm up to people. I could go on and on. All of his little idiosyncrasies , all of the funny feelings I have had about Will's quirky personality for years, they all came flooding to the surface. Is Will more than just quirky? Does he have a learning disability? A sensory disorder? Am I just overreacting?

I expressed my concern to his teacher. She referred me to a professional in the school district who, along with a behavioral AND occupational therapist, evaluate kids in such situations. I had to call and explain my concerns. How do you say, " I think there may be something wrong with my child?" It was explained to me that there was a preliminary test and then a further evaluation if thought necessary. After letting her know my worries combined with his preschool teacher's thoughts, it was decided to jump straight to the evaluation. That right there was a little disconcerting.

In the meantime, we registered Will for the next class. Theo is just 16 months younger than Will and will be beginning the 3 year old preschool class in the fall. We felt by keeping him in the same class again, this could also bring up issues (if not now, then possibly in the future) of self confidence for Will if in the same grade as his little brother. Plus, we are not exactly sure of what is going on and his teacher let us know Will could always switch classes if we felt differently later.

We made the appointment. The soonest they had was 6 weeks out. So then we waited, and in that time, some things changed. Will turned four. Will began to show interest in his name and can now recognize W-I-L-L. He can spell the last three letters and writes the w as one long m. He can now count from 1-5 with some prompting from me. However, as I work with him more on letters, the comprehension is just not there. I realize it is not going to be immediate, but I am seeing signs that he is struggling with comprehending the information. Is he just a boy doing things on his own time? Or is he truly struggling? I go back and forth.

We finally made it to the evaluation last week, and are now currently waiting on the results from the team that evaluated Will. I am pretty nervous but I also realize that if something IS wrong, NOW is the best time to have resources to help Will. No matter what though, my little guy will always be perfect to me.